It’s 1986. You’ve just rented a videotape sporting a mindblowing cover featuring ninjas riding motorcycles and shooting crossbows while dodging exploding helicopters. But you’re in for a surprise. The movie appears to be little more than a cheap Korean gangster film — with a few disconnected scenes of white dudes in gold lamé ninja suits and headbands that say “NINJA.” The action is silly, the movie makes no sense, and the ninjas communicate via toy robots and children’s Garfield phones.

30 years later, here’s your explanation. Pop these mp3s into your cassette deck and learn some Ultimate Ninja Secrets!

EPISODES:

When Bloodsport Met RoboCop